Jodie Turner-Smiths divorce lesson? People dont need to know everything

Jodie Turner Smith filed for divorce from Joshua Jackson last October. She hasn’t looked back since then. Does that surprise you? It surprises me a little bit – years ago, I would have described Jodie as someone who enjoys some TMI, especially about her marriage and personal life. She was even a little bit messy back in the day. But there’s been a real change, a real maturing. It’s nice to see. She’s a single mother to daughter Juno, and she’s not trying to beef with Joshua publicly or privately. But all indications, Jodie simply wanted to move on from the relationship and there wasn’t one big “thing” which caused her to file for divorce. I bring all of this up because Jodie covers the latest issue of The Cut, and much of the piece is about how Jodie is rebuilding her life and trying to grow her career post-Joshua. She comes across as very Zen and at peace with her choices. Some highlights:

Her living situation: After filing for divorce in September, she has been bopping from place to place. Last year, she moved out of Jackson’s childhood home in Topanga Canyon, which she describes as “a very beautiful gilded cage.” She’ll look for her own place in L.A. as soon as she gets back from London where she’s shooting a yet-to-be-announced show. “I don’t have the luxury of turning down a job because of location. I am a single mom now. ‘I got a baby. I need some money. I need cheese for my egg,’ as Ms. Cardi B says.”

Walking her first red carpet with Joshua Jackson at the ‘Queen & Slim’ premiere. “It all came from a really innocent place. I didn’t understand how sinister that could end up being for me. It was taking away from a moment that I needed to have on my own. It opened up a very painful conversation to the world about who I was with and how right or wrong it was to be with that person. And when you’re pregnant, it’s like the most vulnerable time of your life.”

Joshua’s relationship with Lupita Nyong’o. “Good for them. We need happiness in order to peacefully co-parent. I’m trying to get us to the Gwyneth and Chris Martin level. I truly hope they’re happy and that it benefits us as a family.”

When Black people accused her of internalized racism for marrying Joshua. “The most painful was the commentary about why I had chosen him for a partner, that I chose him because I hated myself, because I wanted a light-skinned baby: All these things that are not an accurate reflection of why a person falls in love or at least why this person did. When you’re in the public eye, a part of you belongs to the public. It stops being yours and becomes theirs too. I didn’t have an accurate scope of understanding what it would mean to share my relationship with the public. It’s something I will never do again. Ever. That is one major lesson that I took away from this, which is just that people don’t need to know everything.”

Men are regressing: “No matter how forward-thinking they say they are, men are subject to the conditioning under which they have been raised. And there is just a little part of every man, which says ‘Once a woman has his child, they need to operate in a certain way,’ that is more indicative of limited traditional roles than it is of reality. Every creative needs a partner who’s got to support their choices.”

Breastfeeding: “I’ve looked the same for a very long time. I definitely keep going back and forth about whether I want to get my boobs done, because I breastfed my daughter for three years. My boobs are … They’re relaxed.”

She just needs peace: “I just have to do everything that I can to set Juno up to win and to peacefully co-parent with someone whom I once loved very, very much. Peace is what’s needed right now. Grace is what’s needed right now. Love, empathy, compassion. I’m trying to be all those things and have faith that when I’m all those things, I will see that reflected back toward me.”

[From The Cut]

“That is one major lesson that I took away from this, which is just that people don’t need to know everything.” That’s a good lesson to learn at any age, especially with the internet. Jodie left Twitter a while ago but she’s still on Instagram, and now she’s using it almost purely for work and fashion (which is work for her). The Cut piece makes an interesting point, which is that Jodie did what so many actresses/celebrities did, she parlayed the interest in her personal life into actual work and professional hype. In Jodie’s case, it was treated differently because of her race and because she was married to a white guy who used to be considered such a heartthrob. Anyway, I like what she says about needing peace and wanting everyone to be happy. I’m glad she’s basically taking every job she’s offered too – make that bread, mama.

Cover courtesy of The Cut, additional photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

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